Afternoon Tea Etiquette: A British Guide to Enjoying the Perfect Tea Time

Afternoon tea is a delightful tradition that brings people together to enjoy delicious treats, finger sandwiches, and, of course, tea. However, there’s more to this elegant occasion than just sitting down with a cup of tea. Proper etiquette is key to ensuring you look and feel the part. If you’re wondering how to navigate the world of afternoon tea without making a misstep, here’s a British guide to help you master the dos and don’ts.

Don’t Call It High Tea

The first and most crucial rule: don’t call it high tea. In North America, the term “high tea” is often used incorrectly when referring to afternoon tea. High tea is a dinner meal, served in the evening, typically by the working class. On the other hand, afternoon tea, served in the late afternoon, is a lighter, more social affair with finger sandwiches, scones, and sweet treats. If you’re after an elegant tea experience, stick to calling it “afternoon tea.”

Do Wear a Nice Outfit

Afternoon tea is an occasion that calls for dressing up. You don’t need to go overboard, but avoid looking too casual. A nice pair of trousers or a well-fitted skirt is perfect for men and women alike. You don’t need to wear a tuxedo or ball gown, but dressing for the occasion will help you feel more comfortable and confident. If you’re attending a prestigious venue like The Ritz, check the dress code beforehand as some places may require a jacket and tie.

Do Place Your Napkin on Your Lap

One of the most basic rules of dining etiquette is placing your napkin on your lap as soon as you sit down. This protects your clothes and ensures you’re prepared for any accidental spills. Never tuck the napkin into your chest like a bib, as it’s simply not the proper way. If you need to leave the table, fold your napkin neatly and place it to the left of your plate. When you return, place it back on your lap.

Don’t Keep Your Phone on the Table

While it’s okay to take a few photos to capture the moment, keeping your phone on the table is considered bad manners. Not only is it distracting, but it also takes away from the social experience of afternoon tea. Make sure to keep your phone in your bag or pocket and focus on the conversation and the company around you.

Do Hold the Top of the Teapot When Pouring

When pouring tea from a traditional teapot, always hold the top of the teapot with your other hand to prevent the lid from falling off. If you’re using a metal teapot, be cautious as it can get very hot. Properly holding the teapot ensures a controlled pour without spilling.

Do Use a Tea Strainer If Provided

If the establishment provides a tea strainer, use it! The strainer is there to catch any loose tea leaves. It’s a simple but essential step in ensuring you enjoy your tea without any debris. Place the strainer over your cup and pour the tea slowly. Once you’re finished, remove the strainer and place it carefully back on the saucer.

Do Add Milk to Black Tea

In Britain, it’s perfectly acceptable to add milk to your black tea, though it’s not done with herbal or green teas. Milk in black tea is a common choice, and it adds a creamy texture. If you prefer lemon or honey, ask for it separately. Just be sure to stick with milk for black tea to stay within traditional norms.

Don’t Tap Your Spoon on Your Teacup

When stirring your tea, avoid tapping the spoon on your cup to shake off excess liquid. It’s considered poor etiquette and can be disruptive. Stir gently from 12 o’clock to 6 o’clock, and when you’re finished, lightly shake the spoon to remove any drips, then place it on the saucer.

Don’t Lift Your Saucer

While it may seem natural to pick up your saucer with your teacup, it’s actually improper to do so while seated. Keep your saucer on the table and only lift your teacup. If you’re standing, you can hold both the teacup and saucer in your left hand while sipping from your teacup with your right hand.

Don’t Stick Up Your Pinky Finger

The idea of sticking up your pinky finger while drinking tea is a common misconception of “proper” tea etiquette. In reality, it’s considered rather tacky and uncouth. Holding your teacup with your fingers in a natural, relaxed manner is the best approach.

Don’t Eat in the Wrong Order

When it comes to the order in which you eat, the proper etiquette is to start with the finger sandwiches, then move on to scones, and finish with sweet treats. This ensures that the savory items are enjoyed before the sweeter courses, and you’re able to savor everything in the right balance.

Do Use Your Hands for Most Items

Afternoon tea is one of the few occasions where it’s completely acceptable to eat with your hands. Scones, sandwiches, and most sweet treats should be eaten using your hands. Only use a knife to spread jam and cream on your scone, and a cake fork is appropriate if you’re served a larger slice of cake.

Do Pronounce “Scone” Like “Gone”

In the UK, the correct pronunciation of “scone” rhymes with “gone,” not “cone.” While the pronunciation debate is ongoing, if you want to speak like a true Brit, follow the traditional pronunciation.

Don’t Cut Your Scone

According to British tradition, you should never cut your scone with a knife. Instead, use your hands to break it in half, which helps avoid crumbling. After breaking it apart, spread the jam and cream with a knife for a perfect scone.

Don’t Serve Whipped Cream

Whipped cream is a no-no when it comes to afternoon tea. It’s simply not a part of the traditional experience. Stick to clotted cream, which is richer and has the proper consistency for spreading on your scone. If you can’t find clotted cream, try serving a hand-whipped cream as an elegant substitute.

Do Ask for a Box if You Can’t Finish

If you’re unable to finish your afternoon tea, it’s perfectly acceptable to ask for a box to take the leftovers home. Many establishments will offer this, especially when the portion sizes are generous. If you’re lucky, they may even include extra jam and cream to go along with your leftovers.

Conclusion

Afternoon tea is a timeless British tradition that can be a delightful experience when done right. By following these simple dos and don’ts, you’ll not only avoid embarrassing missteps but also enjoy your tea in the most elegant way possible. So relax, savor your tea, and indulge in this special tradition with confidence.